


Watch the Stars Fall Down

by Fornever_Eden



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Babysitting, Backstory, Derek and Stiles are Mates, Derek is in high school, Drama, F/M, Gen, Humor, Jealousy, M/M, One sided relationship, Origin Story, Original Character(s), Possible spoilers for all seasons, Pre Hale Fire, Stiles and Derek play match makers, Stiles is Derek's Anchor, Stiles is a kid, Trilogy, but nothing creepy happens, making wishes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-27
Updated: 2014-11-06
Packaged: 2018-01-10 05:32:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1155693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fornever_Eden/pseuds/Fornever_Eden
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One day Laura decides that she rather got out with the “hottie” in her English class, so Derek is left babysitting the new Deputy’s ADHD son. That simple decision was the catalyst that sets off a chain reaction where no one was going to escape unscathed. How was anyone supposed to know it was going to change everything? All Derek wanted was peace and quiet.</p>
<p>Or the story about how Derek realized Stiles was his mate and just wanted to keep him happy and safe.</p>
<p>Stiles is 10 and Derek is 15.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue: Once Upon a Time

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first TW fanfic. It's not beta'd. So constructive criticism is welcomed. All errors are mine. I have most of the story planned out. And there might be elements that are mentioned from TW in the story. Specifically about Paige. So, spoilers?
> 
> Prologue:  
> Eoin tells his son the werewolf origin story.

**Chapter 1: Prologue: Once Upon a Time**

For an eight-years-old and a werewolf, Derek was on the smaller side. He’s heard enough runt of the litter jokes to last him a lifetime. Sometimes he would overhear how worried his mom was about his size; was he ever going to be as big as his dad or as smart as his mom, the alpha? So his dad told him a story. It was a story that every born, and some bitten, werewolves knew. It was when he started to believe in hope, that hope was so indomitable that everything will get better even in the face of certain catastrophe. Even though sometimes it seemed like everything was just going to hell, hope was the only way to keep moving forward. To an eight-year-old, with nothing but his future, that sounded pretty awesome. Derek was an optimist. 

That was when he should have known; he should have seen the signs, everything was a warning of the giant time bomb ticking away just waiting to explode. His first lesson was that the cost of his happiness was going through hell first. And hell was a long journey that never seemed to end. His second lesson was that happiness and hope was the stuff for fairytales, not the real world.

Derek was sitting on his bed with his back against the headrest and his ankles crossed. His already thick black eyebrows were pulled down into a crease shielding the glare he was giving his sheets.

“Derek, she means well.” His dad, Eoin, said. He walked into his room picking up a stray t-shirt off the floor. Even though Laura and Derek shared the same dark brown, almost black, hair, Laura had brown eyes like their mother. Derek shared the same color eyes as their father that light green with a tinge of gold. Unlike Laura, the natural leader, Derek was stuck with his mother's inability to express her feelings with anything other than her eyebrows. It was like Laura got everything. And everyone liked to remind Derek-the-runt that it was too bad he didn’t get Talia’s ability to be a leader. Which only served to remind Derek what his mother told him, “Laura’s pack will need betas with better control, Derek, can you at least do that?”

“Clean or dirty?” Eoin asked shaking the shirt.

“You can smell it.” Derek grumbled softly crossing his eight-year-old arms across his chest refusing to look at him.

“Hm, you’re right and you know what? So can you.” He said smiling even though an eyebrow quirked up as if daring Derek to say another sarcastic comment. “And I’m pretty sure you can smell where the hamper is.” 

Derek bit the side of his cheek letting out a response that sounded vaguely like a sorry that got lost in the grumble. He held out the t-shirt for Derek, which he grabbed before stomping to the corner where the hamper was.

“Hm, you know she didn’t mean it like that, she just wants you to be the best you can be.” He gently patted the pajamas on the bed until Derek changed. 

“But she’s always like that.” Derek said dropping his arms like it emphasized his point. “She’s always saying that at my age Laura could do this, she could do that. Laura this and Laura that. Laura blah, blah, blah. Laura’s not the greatest, you know. She’s a dweeb. And, and she’s a girl.”

Eoin smiled, “Laura’s just had more time training. And your mom knows you’ll learn it all soon enough. She just doesn’t know how to tell you. She’s not a very loquacious person.” With Derek’s mouth agape, he raised his eyebrow and cocked his head at her. “Loquacious, adjective, meaning talkative or expressive. She doesn't like to fluff her words.”

“Whatever.” Derek said shaking his head after a few seconds as if he got tired of waiting for the knowledge to sink in. “Do you think I’ll ever become alpha? Laura says I’m going to be stuck as a beta. She called me a runt. She said Jack can carry twenty pounds already, and we’re the same age!” 

“You will one day. It doesn’t matter if you become an alpha or not. What matters is that you will be the best person that you can be. Being an alpha isn’t all about strength and power, Derek, it’s about being a leader and caring for your pack. If you start to focus only on power, you start to forget the real reason you’re an alpha, which is to protect your pack, your family. Your family should always be the most important thing. They are a part of your soul as much as you are to them.” He beamed at Derek and kissed his cheek, which Derek promptly wiped off with the back of his hand. He chuckled before asking, “Did my little alpha brush his teeth?”

Derek nodded pressing his lips together firmly. 

“Derek.” He said sternly.

“What’s the point in asking all these things if you already know the answer?” Derek scowled crossing his arms over his Batman pajamas. 

He smiled. “Because I’m hoping that one day you’ll do it by yourself without me having to tell you.”

Huffing out a sigh, he stomped to the bathroom before turning and peeking around the doorframe. “Don’t leave. You owe me a story.” His eyebrows creased. “And I don’t want the "Little Engine That Could." It’s a stupid book.”

“Okay, my little alpha.” He said chuckling. 

Derek returned a few minutes later deliberately showing him his teeth. Eoin smiled as he pulled back a corner of the blanket. Derek quickly clambered onto the bed pulling the blankets over him. As he settled into the bed, Eoin wrapped his arms around his son hugging him close.  


“I’m going to tell you story Nana told me when I was about your age.” Eoin said clearing his throat.

>>>

Once upon a time when Earth was still new and vibrant when waves of untamed greens and tumultuous blues crashed into each other, there were two kingdoms. A prince was born into the Lupine kingdom; his name was Bae. Shortly after a princess named Aellea was born into the neighboring kingdom called Argent. Since their fathers were friends Bae and Aellea were inseparable. Together they explored the treacherous wilderness that surrounded the castles. They fought off imaginary dragons. They stole treasure from murderous pirates. They battled witches who threatened to take their doubloons. As the years went on their imaginary adventures became a reality; he took up the sword while she mastered archery. Together the Swordsman and the Archer kept the city safe from miscreants, vandals, and crime. They ruled with an unrelenting iron fist.  


One day it was announced that they were be married in a month’s time. Aellea was ecstatic. It was already expected that the Bae and Aellea were to wed. But you see the prince had a secret.  


A few months ago he fell in love with a commoner. Her name was Serenity. She was the exact opposite of Aellea. Where Aellea was fierce, Serenity was gentle; when Aellea was impatient and cruel, Serenity was compassionate and kind. While Aellea’s eyes and hair matched a raven’s cunningness, Serenity’s hair shined like moonlight streaking across the night sky. And her eyes, what drew Bae to her in the first place, were the colors of the ocean shifting between the mysterious blues and the calming greens.  


He never meant for it to happen, you see, he was walking through the market place when he saw a child grab a loaf of bread while the merchant wasn’t looking. Grabbing the boy’s hand, Bae told the child the laws of the land dictated a thief’s hand was to be cut off. Serenity, in all of her compassion, told the prince the child didn’t mean any harm and that she would pay for the bread.  


Bae unsure of what to make of this and the growing crowd said, “the law is the law; the child is a thief.”  


“But surely you must have some sympathy for your servants. Food is scarce, sire, and work is hard to find. He is starving. A child with a missing hand will only steal again or perish. But a child with two hands and shown compassion will forever be indebted to you.” Serenity replied.  


“Food is scarce?” Bae asked looking into her eyes for any sign of deceit.  


“Yes, unless you are rich.”  


Bae not seeing any signs of Serenity lying looked around the market and for the first time noticed the limited food in the stalls and his malnourished subjects. Startled by the sight, he gave a few coins to the child saying stealing was not a way to survive. The child nodded before running off. From that moment, when Bea was not at the castle he was with Serenity. She showed him what life was like on the other side of the wall, the struggles his people had to endure. But mostly what he needed to do to make the kingdom the greatest because his kingdom was his family and he would do anything for his family.  


Aellea knew something was wrong with Bae. When he nearly ran out of the castle during the wedding announcement celebrations she followed, curious as to why her future husband left. She watched him as he pounded on a door. She watched through narrowed eyes as he begged Serenity to leave with him. Aellea clenched her hands tight until they bled when he told Serenity he loved her and only her forever. The princess smiled when Serenity replied she loved him and agreed to leave him at week’s end. Aellea had a plan. No one was going to make a fool out of her.  


Wearing a disguise Aellea travelled deep into the woods to seek out the powerful witch who had a grudge against the Argent kingdom for putting her son in prison. She told the witch that in exchange for doing as she asked the witch’s son would be freed. The witch agreed. The witch told her to look for the signs.  


At the end of the week, Aellea grew anxious wondering if the witch tricked her. Suddenly there was a loud crash from Bae’s room and a loud howl tore through the castle. Rushing to see, Aellea stood in front of Bae’s room staring at the large black wolf standing in the middle of the room bathed in the bright moonlight.  


“It worked.” She said gleefully.  


“You know what happened to my son?” King Lupine asked.  


“Of course. I made him the beast he is and I will hunt him down for all of eternity. So run, Bae, run! And just know you will never see her again.” Aellea said shooting an arrow toward the wolf. Bae quickly leapt out of the window to avoid the arrow.  


Screams from below could be heard as the large wolf weaved through the winding alleyways searching for the house that was so familiar. But something was pulling him away toward the woods telling him that it wasn’t safe out in the open. The urge to be safe was too strong. So he ran into the woods and hid. The moon shone overhead gently casting its light over him. Bae tilted his head back and let out a mournful howl.  


The following morning, sniffing the air, he ventured out to the familiar house. Serenity was gone. He buried his nose into her pillow trying to remember. But all of his memories were fading away. That night, the moonlight that surrounded him smelled like the market on that first day, the ripe strawberries, the bread, and the kegs of wine. How could moonlight have a smell? The memories of that day tugged at Bae as he once again let out a low, pained howl.  


The door burst open. Bae quickly stood with his fur bristling, he snarled at the sudden intrusion.  


“My poor Prince. There isn’t much I can do. But I will help.” The witch said.  


“This will work Emissary?” The King asked. “This will cure him of what you did?”  


“No. Nothing can do that. I can make him human again, however, he will forever have two souls battling inside of him. Sometimes the wolf will come free. Once a month he will become the wolf. Instinct will take over, but he will be able to have some control. Another thing, your highness, his children, through his own seed and those he bites, will be cursed as well.” The Emissary said sadly. She began chanting in a long forgotten language and slowly, ever so slowly, Bae’s claws and elongated teeth began to recede.  


“I’m human again.” Bae said touching his face. “Where is Serenity?”  


The Emissary casted her eyes downwards. “There was a reason you howled at the moon. She became the moon. There wasn’t much I could do for her. She has been scattered across the world like moonbeams. Find her and your souls will find peace; the wolf and the human souls will be in harmony.”  


“How do I find her?”  


“You will know because she will smell like home. Every werewolf will have a Lunar Mate. The person will always smell different but always of home, of that moment of being at peace. My offspring and I will forever serve you as penance for my errors.”  


Before Bae left on his quest to find his Lunar Mate, Bae’s trusted friend and second, Beta, volunteered to help. Beta being ever so loyal agreed to be bitten. So, together they travelled through the lands looking for Serenity. There were days that Beta could not stop Bae from biting someone. But slowly his pack became his family as he relied on them and they on him. Together his pack dodged the Argent hunters all across the kingdoms. Until one day in a far away village he smelled it, the market from that day.  


“There you are. I’ve been waiting for you to come home.” Serenity said smiling. The prince felt it inside the two souls merging into one. He was at peace. He returned to his kingdom to rule with the kindness and fairness that his people deserved with Serenity’s guidance. 

>>>

“That’s a terrible story, Dad. There are werewolves because some guy fell in love with a girl? Girls are so stupid. All they do is mess everything up.” Derek said pulling the edge of his blanket up to his chin when he was done telling the story. “Are you saying that you want me to find my Lunar Mate? Or that I can’t be an alpha until I find mine?” He scrunched up his face at the thought of kissing a girl.

“No, you silly goose.” Eoin said. Derek felt the laugh vibrate through Eoin's chest. “I told you the story so that you remember where we come from. We all struggle with taming the wolf until we find our Lunar Mate. The Lunar Mate is anything that makes us whole. It can be anything that helps you maintain control. Derek you just have to have hope for the future.”

“But there are true alphas. I heard Uncle Peter saying he thinks Laura is one.” Derek said frowning.

“There are, but they still have to learn. For some people leading comes naturally but they still have to learn. Derek, you’re eight-years-old there is plenty of time to worry about all of this. Your mother doesn’t mean anything when she compares you with Laura. There is nothing wrong with being a beta. Every alpha needs betas, loyal and strong ones. Betas have a big role just like alphas. Everyone has a role in a family.” Eoin said pulling the blanket further onto Derek. “But Derek remember if you become an alpha, become the alpha your pack deserves. Because when things get difficult your pack will turn to you for the encouragement and the morale to continue when it seems like there is no hope. You will have to be their hope even when you have none. That is the burden of being an alpha.”  


“I can do that.” Derek whispered drowsily as his eyes drifted close.  


“I’m glad. Good night my little alpha.” Eoin whispered pressing a kiss on his forehead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I came to the realization that I had to change something. It's not really major. It's just instead of Derek's mom talking to him it's his dad. See when I originally started writing this story, the Dad was going to be the alpha and Talia was going to tell Derek the story. But then TW decided Talia was the alpha. So in order to follow canon as much as possible, Talia became the alpha in this story. I figured I could just flip the characters' role in this story. I wasn't really happy with the outcome, but I figured it was fine. But as I thought more about it I realized that I can't for future events to unfold. Which is why I had to change things. If you see any parts that you think should be switched from Talia to Eoin (the dad) then let me know. I tried to catch all of it.


	2. A Thousand Broken Wings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Under your stars tonight  
> And I am so overwhelmed  
> By a thousand broken wings
> 
> “A Thousand Broken Wings”  
> -Flyleaf
> 
> Derek finds out what home smells like, and it hurts. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the kudos! 
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Wolf nor am I affiliated with them. The title of this story came from the song "The Fallout" by Crown the Empire. I am also not affiliated with them. Just so you know I am not affiliated with anyone famous. From this chapter onwards there will probably be a song associated with it. And this will be the only disclaimer.
> 
> All errors are my own doing.

**Chapter 2: A Thousand Broken Dreams**

Claudia Stilinski walked into the Beacon Hills Library holding her son’s hand. It was a rather small library. But it held all the adventures she planned on having with Cadet. Well, almost all. 

“Remember Cadet you know the type of behavior I expect from you.”

“Yes, mom.” Cadet said rolling his doe like brown eyes. 

“Aria said she would be here soon.” Claudia said ruffling his hair. “Isn’t it getting a little long?” 

“Don’t mess with the hair.” Cadet said flailing his arms trying desperately to protect his hair. “It’s perfect the way it is.”

Claudia laughed the corners of her smile reaching her eyes. 

“Look they have story time.” Cadet said pulling her toward the children’s room with a large fake wooden tree against a wall. 

>>>

When Talia told Derek what he was going to be reading to the children, he rolled his eyes. She told him reading to the kids was his punishment for staying home all the time. For the past six months he was holed up in his room only leaving for school and food. Then there were the nights where he woke up screaming, begging Talia to take away the memories of Paige. But she wouldn’t. Saying it was the only way to remember so it doesn’t happen again. 

So, there he sat under the fake tree reading _The Three Little Pigs_ to the ten children sitting on the little toadstool stools. Then he smelled it. It smelled like the woods behind his house right after it rained, when life begins swirling in the air. It reminded him of the first full moon he transformed on; he was six at the time. A little late, his mom reminded him, but he transformed. And everything was magical that night. Derek remembered that night perfectly, the ground was still damp from the heavy rain the night before and the air was heavy with the moisture trapped by the trees. But Derek could feel it, the earthworms gently moving the earth underneath his bare feet where his tiny claws dug into the dirt; he could see the tiny birds high in the trees nestled closely together; he could taste the sweetness of the earth with every breath. For the first time he felt at home in the woods. It was the first day he started to understand the gift of the wolf.

“Dad, what’s that smell?” Derek asked tugging at his shirt. He pointed toward a clump of fallen tree logs. Underneath the smell of rotting, damp wood was the smell of an animal like the ones he smelled at the zoo. 

“Listen closely, Derek, what do you hear?” Eoin whispered. He kneeled to his level.

“Heartbeats.” Derek closed his eyes focusing only on listening to the soft steady thumps from the log.

“Good. How many?”

“I can’t tell. I hear yours, Uncle Peter, Mom's.”

“Listen, just focus on that area.”

Derek tilted his head toward the log and listened. “Two.”

“Right. There’s a mommy deer and her fawn. I’m proud of you.” Eoin whispered pressing a kiss to his cheek. He stood up ushering his son forward leading him deeper into the woods.

“We’re not going to do anything?” Derek turned looking back at the deer’s hiding place.

“Why?”

“We’re wolves and they’re deer. My teacher said that’s what animals do.”

“Just because we turn into a wolf doesn’t make us animals. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Leave them be, we have plenty of food at home. Don’t ever let the wolf take over. Don’t become an animal.”

“Then what’s the point of having these abilities?”

“When we first came out here, you thought it was magical. And it is. But if you hurt someone, then you’re no better than the wolf that’s inside you. We all need to learn how to balance the wolf and the human.” Eoin replied. “Do you hear all of your cousins at home? They’re the ones we’re protecting. So our gift reminds us to appreciate everything we have. And to protect those who can’t protect themselves. It’s a gift, Derek, even if you don’t see it now. Use your wolf to be a protector. ” 

Derek nodded thinking about all the people he wanted to protect, except for Laura because she’s a booger. 

“Mr. Derek, you stopped reading.” A voice called out pulling Derek away from the woods in his mind and back to the fake tree with the fake toadstools.

“What?” Derek said frowning looking at the excited faces nodding in agreement.

“What happens next? What happened to the pigs?” The boy asked from the back still holding his mom’s hand.

“Um, right.” Derek replied and continued to read the story. Once the book was over Derek tilted his head trying to locate the smell that reminded him of being home in the woods. But the smell was gone.

Later that day while Talia drove them home, she asked, “What happened back there?”

“Nothing.” Derek shrugged his shoulders and leaned back into his seat. He stared out at the passing houses thinking about the smell and what it could mean.

“Derek, I wish you would talk to me. You used to talk to me. But ever since Paige, you’ve shut me out.” 

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Derek growled. He felt the burning behind his eyes signaling the change to the icy blue. Derek quickly rubbed his eyes willing the blue to disappear. He hated the color. He hated what the color meant. He hated it.

“Derek, stop that. You’re going to damage your eyes.” Talia said pulling his hand away. “What’s done is done. But please just talk to me. Talk to Laura. Anyone. You can’t keep this bottled up inside.”

“It was my fault. I didn’t protect her when I should have.” Derek refused to say another word instead he went back to staring out the window.

When they reached the manor, Derek quickly stepped out of the car slamming the door shut. 

“Derek, it wasn’t your fault. We talked about this.” Talia said following Derek up the stairs to the house. 

“I killed her.” Derek replied. Talia stared at her son’s back smelling the blood dripping onto the floor from his tightly closed fists. “Don’t tell me it wasn’t my fault when I can still remember what her last heartbeat felt like. I became an animal.”

“Derek…” Talia began to say as he walked up to his room ignoring her. She sighed unsure of how to help her son. 

*~*

Derek was in his room doing his chemistry homework, later that night, when Laura went in plopping down on his bed. She tells him there’s a new deputy in town (sounding exactly like an old western movie) and that he brought his wife and son. Derek just stared at her waiting for her to explain why it was so important to tell him this information. They’re looking for a babysitter, she explained. He continued to stare. He knows Laura knows that he hates kids and all their snot. 

“You know mom’s just worried about you.” Laura said sighing picking at a loose thread on her shirt. “I told her you just need time. But Derek it’s been six months. It’s time to stop blaming yourself.”

“But it is my fault, Laura! If I didn’t go to Ennis she would still be alive.” Derek shouted rubbing his eyes. He quickly stood so that Laura wouldn’t see his eyes. The monster he became. 

“If Uncle Peter hadn’t suggested it in the first place, she would still be alive.” Laura said calmly.

Derek looked away, “He was trying to help.”

“Uncle Peter only helps when it either benefits himself or it will be amusing to him. Which category do you think your love life falls under for him?” Laura asked raising her eyebrow. What bothered Laura was that even she couldn’t answer the question. It was a known fact that Peter had his own agenda. Everything was a calculated move on his part, and he was always ten-steps ahead of everyone else. 

Derek rolled his eyes before turning back to balancing chemical formulas. 

“Derek, something else is bothering you. What is it?”

Derek breathed out loud unsure of where to start, “When I was at the library, I smelled something. It was only for a few seconds, but it smelled like the first time I shifted.”

“The first time you shifted?”

“Yeah. I don’t know how to describe it. It smelled like the earth, the rain, and books.”

“Books? I wonder why.” Laura smiled.

“Shut up.” Derek growled. “If you’re going to be annoying, you can leave.”

Laura laughed, “I miss this, Derek.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “Why’d you come in here anyways? You know I hate kids and I don’t care who moves here.” Derek said, clearly trying to avoid the subject. Laura reminded herself to look into later.

“Oh right, you remember I told you about the girl that Charlie keeps drooling over in class?” Laura replied. She leaned in closer to Derek smiling. 

“The one with the weird name?”

“Yeah her. Well rumor has it that the new deputy is really her father and that they moved here to be closer to her. Because I mean who willingly moves to Beacon Hills?”

“He’s her uncle.” Charlie said from the doorway. “And I don’t drool.” Even though Charlie and Laura were the same age, his soft gray eyes made him seem older than his seventeen years. And add his black shaggy hair, he always managed to look like he didn’t want to be bothered because he was busy looking into your soul. 

“You drool like a St. Bernard on a hot summer day.” Laura said smirking.

“Really Laur, dog jokes again. I need to leave this family.” Charlie said leaning against the doorframe. Derek and Laura both knew no matter how many times he said that, Charlie loved the family. 

“When are you going to ask her out?” 

Charlie shot a quick look at Derek before replying, “I’m not.”

A silence fell upon them as the unspoken reason sank into them; Charlie was a werewolf she wasn’t. Just like Derek and Paige. They all knew that every werewolf was afraid of being with a human. What if you hurt the person? What if the person freaks out? They all knew what could happen. It was the curse of being a werewolf.

“Charlie, you told me once that you smelled something when you were around her that made you drool what was it?” Laura couldn’t handle the silence any longer. 

“Why?”

“Humor me.”

Charlie sighed. “When my mom was alive she loved baking. She always smelled like vanilla. The kitchen was our favorite place. You know? Once my dad brought her these wild flowers. They were pink and purple, I remember. He had to have been searching forever because there were dozens of flowers. So Aredian smells like wild flowers and vanilla. She reminds me of that day. It was right before my mom died.” Charlie replied with a soft smile tugging at his lip. Raising his eyebrow he asked, “Why?”

“Oh no reason.” Laura said. Laura smiled before walking out the room pulling Charlie -- who was still questioning her-- behind her. Derek was starting to really hate that smile. It was a smile that said she was up to something. She must have learned it from Uncle Peter.


	3. Wake Me Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All this time I was finding myself  
> 
> 
> And I didn't know I was lost  
> 
> 
> I tried carrying the weight of the world  
> 
> 
> But I only have two hands
> 
> "Wake Me Up"
> 
>   
> -Avicii
> 
>  
> 
> Derek babysits and is terrible with names. Stiles makes wishes.

**Chapter 3: Wake Me Up**

Derek had a secret he never told anyone because no else really thought of their wolf as being separate from their human soul. To everyone else the fairytale of two separate souls was just that, a fairytale. But when he was younger, he would lie in bed categorizing his human thoughts from his wolf’s desire. Was liking his steak rare a wolf desire or human? Was liking to run out in the woods rather than on the concrete wolf or human? 

So he thought it was fitting to give it a name. He named his wolf Arch because he wasn’t sure if the wolf would be his angel or nemesis, his savior or his destruction. But after Paige, Derek was sure Arch was his enemy. Because a human soul wouldn’t have let her death happen.

Ever since the incident at the library Derek kept thinking about the fairytale, about the Lunar Mate and how the person supposedly smelled like home, whatever that meant. May be Arch smelled something that day. May be home meant the woods to him. He did always feel at peace there like he could finally relax. Arch wasn’t clawing away and the human part wasn’t worrying about anything. There was peace; there was balance. But now, the smell excited Arch. Paige didn’t smell like that. She smelled like strawberries. Derek thought about asking Charlie since it seemed like they were going through the same thing. May be it wasn’t a stupid Lunar Mate story and just puberty. But Derek couldn’t bring himself to ask anyone. 

About a month after Laura told Derek that the new deputy needed a babysitter, Laura rushed into Derek room begging him to babysit for her. Apparently she got a date with a hottie, whatever that means. Why the cousin with the weird name couldn’t do it, Derek didn’t understand. But he finally agreed to babysit after telling her she owed him big time. Laura smiled and patted his knee. He hated that smile.

Honestly, Derek didn’t really pay attention to what Laura told him about the family. He really should have. Something about not giving the kid (with another funny name) any sugar, caffeine, or energy drinks. And to bring ear plugs for his headphones. Something about super hearing not mixing well with the kid. None of her tips really make any sense and she didn’t elaborate, just gave him that stupid smile. One day he was going punch that smile right off her stupid face even if Talia told him not to hit girls. He figured it didn’t apply to werewolves. Or sisters. 

By the time Derek walked up to the front door, he knew this was a mistake. He couldn’t believe he let Laura dupe him into doing this. He shouldn’t have agreed to this, even if the lady answered the door with a warm smile that made Derek almost want to smile back. Almost.

“Mrs. Stalesky?” Derek asked shoving his hands into his pocket and shifting his weight. God, why did everyone in this family have a weird name? Derek thought to himself.

“It’s actually Stilinski. Stalesky that’s a new one.” The lady blinked a few times extending the silence before smiling brightly. “You must be Derek. Laura told me you’d you coming by. Normally I would interview the babysitter but she said you’re her brother and that you love kids. But don’t let Stiles turn you off from having kids…I don’t mean have kids now…I mean later…when you’re older…and financially stable and you found someone who you love…I’m just going to stop now. Cadet, get down here!”

Derek nodded his head unsure of what to do. “Wait I thought your son’s name was Getum or something like that?” 

“Genim, but he doesn’t like that name and, well, everyone just calls him Stiles.” Mrs. Stilinski says then whispers, “He had a hard time pronouncing Stilinski. He kept saying Stileski. So that’s how he got Stiles. Oh, where are my manners? Come in, Derek. I'm Claudia by the way.”

“What kind of name is Genim?” The moment Derek stepped into the living room of the house he was suddenly engulfed in the smell from the library. The smell of the woods right after it rained and of books surrounded him like a blanket. Arch preened inside wanting to search for the source of the smell. Derek closed his eyes to settle the wolf instinct to hunt.

“AH! Laura never calls me that!” Derek stared at a kid pointing at him from the top of the stairs.

“He’s…this is my son Stiles…he’s um…there’s really nothing good I can say. Really wait to have kids.” Mrs. Stilinski said.

Stiles whined, “You’re my mom you’re supposed to say nice things. Lie if you have to.”

“Lying is bad. We talked about this. I don’t know if Laura told you but he has ADHD. But he takes medicine for it.”

And all through their bickering Derek couldn’t believe that this brat was the same brat from the library. He can’t be the one giving off that smell. He can’t.

“Where’s Laura? Whoareyou? Ohmygoshareyouinabikergang? LikeHell’sAngel? Imeanyou’rewearingaeatherjacketandeverything.” Derek was sure that to the kid it sounded like normal sentences with pauses and everything. But to everyone else it was a long chain of indiscernible syllables. 

“Cadet we talked about this. You don’t have to get as many words in as possible. It isn’t a contest because believe me kid you’d win.” She enunciated each word as if trying to prove a point. If that was supposed to show that kid how normal people talk, it was clearly not working. “Alright. Cadet I’ll see you later. Call me if there are any problems. Mr. Stilinski, John, should be back around 11.” 

Derek nodded. She completely ignored Stiles as he relentlessly asked how she could leave him with a biker and how this was child endangerment.

“Okay let’s get this straight my mom may have left me with a biker. But I’m not afraid of you…” Stiles said standing in front of Derek with his hands on his hips. He took a small step back when Derek glared at him. “Okay maybe a little.”

Derek rolled his eyes before telling the kid to do his homework. Derek, on the other hand, went into the kitchen to make the annoying brat something to eat.

“Hey, hey, do you even know how to take care of…” Stiles started to say following Derek into the kitchen. He sat down on one of the chairs at the kitchen counter. 

“What take care of a brat before? They can’t be that much different from kids.” Derek snarked. He pulled out a box of macaroni and some cheese. The brat started rambling on about something it may have been about dogs. He seemed content in just talking at Derek, which was fine with Derek because for some reason listening to Stiles talk drowned out Arch’s restlessness.

“Why doesn’t your cousin babysit?” Derek continued stirring the pot when Stiles stopped talking.

Stiles shrugged, “She’s busy.”

Derek could tell Stiles was trying hard to believe his own lie, he didn’t even need to hear the blip in Stiles’ heartbeat. “Your cousin is the one with the weird name right?” Derek spooned some of the mac and cheese into a bowl and placed it in front of Stiles.

“It’s not weird!” Stiles replied taking a bite of the food. He quickly started fanning his mouth. “Hot. Hot. Hot.” 

“Idiot.” Derek growled. “Of course it’s hot. You saw me cook it. Here,” Derek handed Stiles a cup of ice water and started to blow on the food to help cool it down.

“Everyone just calls her Aria though.” Stiles said wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Derek rolled his eyes handing Stiles a napkin. “Your eyes are going to stay like that if you continue doing that.”

“What are you talking about?” 

“Rolling your eyes, that’s what my mom told me. If you roll your eyes too much then it can become permanent.” 

“Whatever, just hurry up and finish your dinner. You need to do your homework.”

“Bed time kid.” Derek said turning off the TV. They were watching Teen Wolf. Well, it was more like watching them. Derek couldn’t hear anything over Stiles chatter. 

“You know if werewolves are real that would be so cool. I would want to be one. Super hearing would be awesome. Do you think there is a supernatural world? I think there is. Nobody at my old school appreciated those things. They kept saying that stuff is for kids.”

“It’s 9. Way past your bedtime kid.” Derek said after awhile of listening to the kid ramble. 

“Wait, Laura lets me look at the stars.” Stiles said. Stiles pushed all of his weight back trying to stop Derek from herding him up the stairs. 

“I’m not Laura.” Derek said pushing Stiles further up with ease. He was a werewolf after all.

“I’m aware of that. I can tell the difference. She’s the nice one.” Stiles said grabbing the rails. Stiles felt the low rumble reverberate through Derek’s chest. “Or not. I mean you’re nice too.”

“Will it get you to shut up and go to bed?” Derek says. He stopped pushing and waited for a response.

“Probably not but I’ll try.” Stiles used the opportunity to duck under Derek’s arm and headed outside to the backward before Derek could change his mind. It wasn’t the greatest place to stargaze but it worked. Stiles lay down on the grass and looked up. Being outside under the stars, he could just let his mind wander and get lost in the billions of stars. He could forget everything. After awhile he turned his head toward where Derek stood watching on the porch. Obviously, Derek wasn’t going to be winning any best babysitter awards but he was doing a lot better than Stiles thought. But he was nowhere near as good as Laura or Aria.

“Why don’t you come look at it with me?” Stiles asked patting the area next to him. Derek rolled his eyes, but still sat down next to Stiles.

“Why does your mom call you Cadet?” Derek asks.

“Oh, that, it’s short for Space Cadet because one day I’m going up there.” Stiles said pointing to the sky. “Where we lived before in Alaska you could see like every star and the aura borealis were amazing. But then we moved here and all the lights and pollution. Blegh.” 

“I though it was because you’re so spacey.” Derek mumbled. Being next to Stiles, Derek realized the smell that he wanted to roll around in was coming from Stiles. How wrong and pedophilic was that? But it wasn’t like he wanted to do anything to him. It was more like he felt like he could finally breathe. He didn’t have to keep some sort of wall up anymore. He wasn’t constantly reminded of how much he screwed up with Paige or that his eyes were blue instead of the warm honey color that his mom loved so much or that he wasn’t going to be an alpha. Basking in the smell of home on that crisp fall day, Derek was just an average teenager again.

“It might be that as well. But I just love how the Greeks were so creative in what they saw. How did they see a giant bear in the Big Dipper?” Stiles drew an imaginary line connecting all the stars of the Big Dipper.

“There’s actually a nice place to go around here. It’s called Pride Rock. May be I could take you, if your mom says it’s okay.” Derek said. His eyes widens after realizing what he just offered. Did he really just offer to watch the kid for another day? 

“Really? That would be awesome.” Stiles replied brightening up. “Why’s it called Atlas's Peak? Where is it? Can you see everything?” The questions started spilling out of Stiles’ mouth faster than before. Excitement was clearly this kid’s trigger. But somewhere deep inside of Derek, Arch started to beam with happiness. So, Derek told Stiles all about the rock and he could see all of Beacon Hills and the stars above. After awhile, Stiles started to shiver from the cool air so Derek placed his leather jacket on top of him.

“Thanks. Does this jacket make me a cool biker kid now?” Stiles smiled. 

“I don’t have a motorcycle.”

“Do you believe in shooting stars?” Stiles asked softly watching a star streak across the sky. Derek wasn’t sure of how to respond. Do you tell a kid the truth or let them believe for a little while longer? It was like the Santa incident all over again. He swears he didn't mean to ruin Christmas for Cora.

“I hope it’s true.” Stiles mumbled after awhile as he drifted to sleep wrapped in the jacket.

>>>

Stiles really tried to wait for Derek to take him up to this Atlas's Peak. He really did. He waited an entire day before deciding it was painfully clear that Derek wasn’t going to be fulfilling his promise. Who breaks a promise to a little kid? Stiles couldn’t help wondering. That’s just mean. So, he began planning. It was a rare night where Claudia didn’t have the night shift. Since she was new to the hospital she usually got the nights. It was perfect. She usually fell asleep early, which made sneaking out easy. After she went to sleep, Stiles packed his backpack full of snacks and a bottle of water. He quietly closed the door behind him and headed toward the outskirts of town. 

“Where are you going?” A familiar gruff voice asked from behind Stiles just as he approached the ‘Now leaving Beacon Hills’ sign. It wasn’t like Derek was stalking Stiles or anything like that. Derek had been in his room reading when he smelled Stiles close by. Curious, and knowing it was way too late for him to be out, he decided to see where the kid was going. He followed Stiles for a few blocks, okay so he was stalking him a little, until Stiles reached the city limits. Derek could feel Arch pacing inside wondering why Stiles was trying to leave town. He knew Stiles wasn’t exactly happy about leaving Alaska, but he didn’t think it was so bad that Stiles wanted to leave. 

“Ah, poop.” Stiles huffed out. He slowly turned to face the scowling Derek. “Hi, Derek. How are you doing?”

Derek stood there with his hands fisted in the pockets of his jacket as he growled. “Where are you going Stiles?”

“Dude, you told me you’d take me to Atlas's Peak. And you didn’t. That makes you liar.”

“I told you that last night. And I never told you when.” Derek rolled his eyes. Arch began to settle understanding that Stiles wasn’t trying to leave he just wanted to see the stars.

“Well, I was excited.” Stiles stammered. “What you doing out here anyways?”

Derek raised an eyebrow. “Does your mom know you’re here?”

“Does yours?”

“Unlike you, I don’t have a curfew.” Derek replied. He grabbed Stiles by the back of shirt to start leading him back home. Stiles twisted trying to get out Derek’s grip.

Stiles sighed giving up. “Were you going to take me?”

“I said I would.” Derek mumbled letting go of Stiles’ shirt as the city lights came into view.

“Cadet!” Claudia yelled. She came running out of the house clutching the phone once she spotted the pair walking up the driveway. “Where were you? I woke up to check on you and you weren’t in bed. I called Aunt Maggie and your father.”

“You called dad?” Stiles bit his lip.

“Yes. I thought you were kidnapped.”

“From the second story?”

“Cadet, you can’t just leave.” Claudia sighed. She hugged Stiles tightly. “I was worried.”

“I’m sorry.” 

“Thank you Derek.” She said finally looked at him. Derek nodded before heading back home. He didn’t want to be there should the deputy question how he knew where to find Stiles.

>>>

“Oh, well, if it isn’t liar-pants.” Stiles said answering the door. Apparently, for the past week Stiles was grounded and part of the punishment meant Laura or Aria babysat him. It may have been because he liked it more when Derek watched him. 

“Nice to see you too.” Derek said stepping into the living room. “I didn’t lie.”

“Cadet, is it Laura?” Claudia yelled from the second floor.

“No, it’s Derek.” Stiles replied. “I’m still mad at you. And there is no way that you can make it up to me by the way.” 

“You’re not mad.” Derek said. He shrugged his leather jacket off and places it on the coffee table. Derek could see how hard Stiles was trying not to smile. He knew why Derek was there.

“That depends on your definition.” Stiles said.

“Well I thought I would take you to Atlas's Peak. But if you’re mad then I guess we don’t have to go.” Derek shrugged his shoulders. “But you have to finish your homework first.”

“You drive a hard bargain Mr. Hale. But seeing as you bailed on your promise I think there should be ice cream involved.”

“Cadet, you already had dessert stop trying to swindle more.” Claudia said walking down in her scrubs. “Thanks Derek for coming, especially after last week. I already spoke to Cadet about it. So he knows how dangerous and stupid that was. Cadet I’ll see you tomorrow and Dad will be home around 11. Bye, love you.” Claudia blew kisses as she closed the door.

“She means me not you.” Stiles said once his mom leaves.

Derek rolled his eyes. He looked back and forth between Stiles and the worksheets on the table.

“I get it. I’m doing my homework.”

An hour later, right when Derek got to a really interesting part in his book, Stiles threw his pencil down shouting that he finished his homework. Derek stared at him raising his eyebrows flicking his eyes to the nearby bag.

“Fine. I’ll put my homework in my bag…nicely.” Stiles said walking quickly to his room. Derek could hear him muttering about bikers incapable of using actual human words and how there’s probably a maximum amount of words Derek could use before his head will explode. Derek shook his head walking to the kitchen. 

By the time Stiles comes back down Derek finished pouring hot chocolate into the thermos he had brought over.

“Oh my god is that hot chocolate? It better have marshmallows in it.” Stiles quickly said trying to reach for the thermos. Derek quickly moved the thermos out of his reach.

“If I put the marshmallows in it they’d be dissolved by the time we got there. Do you want that?” Derek raised an eyebrow because he already knew the answer. 

“Obviously not, who would want that kind of hot chocolate? Everyone knows it’s the marshmallows that makes it the greatest thing in the world.” 

The drive to Atlas's Peak wasn’t that bad. Stiles filled the silence by telling Derek all about Lydia and what she was wearing that day and about his plans to marry her one day. He even made a five year plan which he admitted might be a little longer, it depended on whether or not she remembered his name next week. To which Derek tightly griped the steering wheel willing it keep going straight and not toward an innocent little girl’s house to murder. Arch gave a soft growl that Derek was barely able to suppress. Why couldn’t she see how special Stiles was?

“How much longer?” Stiles whined.

“Not that much, but we have to walk about ten minutes.” Derek said stealing a glance to the boy sitting next to him. He can’t help but notice that perhaps to anyone this would probably seem strange, in a bad way. He had to keep reminding himself that this was completely innocent. That’s when it dawns on Derek that Stiles was too trusting of people. He’s completely different from Derek.

“Ten minutes? That’s like forever.”

“Keep whining and I’ll turn the car around.” Derek gently pressed on the brakes to emphasize his point.

“But you promised. You can’t break your promise twice. That’s just mean. And I’ll tell Laura. She told me to tell her if you were ever mean to me.” Stiles said turning in his seat. From the corner of his eyes Derek could tell Stiles was looking at him with those big, honey-brown eyes. Derek’s jaw tightened when he realized the color of Stiles’ eyes was the exact same shade that he missed, the same shade that the electric, icy blue replaced. Looking at Stiles he realized why he missed it, there was warmth in those eyes. 

Derek sighed, “Fine. Just be quiet.” This kid is going to be the death of him one day.

“Have you met me?”

When they finally get to the rock Stiles was practically bouncing off the trees staring up at the sky that Derek had to keep reaching out just to keep Stiles from tripping over the exposed roots. “Thanks Derek for you know keeping your promise and bringing me here. I know you don’t really want to hang out with a kid. I know you have like big kids stuff that you’d rather do.” Stiles sipped the hot chocolate that Derek poured him along with the fifty pieces of mini marshmallows.

Derek snorted into his cup. Big kids stuff, if that includes being a werewolf and killing innocent people. Derek thought bitterly to himself. 

“Have you ever heard of tanabata? It’s this star festival in Japan. The legend goes there was a princess who fell in love with this guy. But when the king found out he forced them apart. He put the guy and the girl on opposite sides of the Milky Way. But these birds realized how sad the couple was so once a year they would all line up just so that the couple could see each other. And on that night the people in Japan all make a wish.” Stiles said pointing at the two stars on either side of the Milky Way. He liked that story; well he liked the ending when the couple was able to be together even if it was just for one night. It was better than never being with the person ever again. He couldn’t imagine wanting to be with someone, being able to see the person and yet the person was always out of reach. Plus, he got to make a wish on that day. It had to work this time. 

“That’s sad?” Derek wasn’t sure how he was supposed to respond to the story. There really wasn’t any point in believing in fairytales. There’s no such thing as happy endings. But what do you say to a kid who still believes in happy endings?

“I guess the beginning but then they get to see each other again.”

“But it’s just for one day. I’d rather not.” Derek replied. There’s a distant howl came from the direction of his house. He listened for a little while smirking when he realizes that it was just one of the pups learning how to howl.

“Derek, are you listening?” Stiles pouted, his bottom lip sticking out a little.

“I’m listening. I’m not depressing.”

“You’re such a sour wolf.” Stiles muttered leaning back against a tree trunk.

“What?” Derek sat up straighter realizing what Stiles just said. Why would he say that? Did he know? But how could he know? Derek tries to think back to all the times that he babysat; did the wolf ever come out? He doesn’t think so. He’s pretty sure. 

“It was something Laura said.” Stiles said. He put his hand on Derek’s shoulder. “Don’t worry I know.” Derek clenched his teeth. This was it. Stiles was going to tell him that he was a freak and to never come near him again. “I know you’re just emotionally constipated.”

A pregnant silence weighed heavily on Derek. So by the time Derek had thought of a response Stiles had already moved onto talking about the newest Batman episode.

>>> 

Later that night, Laura barged into Derek’s room, as usual. At first she just stood there sniffing the air.

“You smell like him” Laura said quirking up and eyebrow. 

“I took him up to Atlas's Peak. He fell asleep so I carried him to the car.” Derek replies. He didn’t really want to have whatever talk his sister deemed necessary. “Is that okay Laurasaurus?” 

Laura lets out a warning growl that Derek ignores. “I hate that name.”

“Then you shouldn’t have told him to call me Sour Wolf. Karma’s a bitch.” Derek smirked.

Laura rolled her eyes at the terrible wordplay. “Derek what do you know about Lunar Mates?” May be because he’s her little brother, may be because it’s the fact that she wants to protect him that Laura wants to help him in any way that she can. And that includes keeping this all a secret. 

“And you know I don’t mean that crap that Stephanie Meyer managed to spew out about imprinting. Granted she did get some things right, somehow, but most of it is just crap and not in a craptastic way either.” 

Derek’s shoulders gave a slight upward tug; Derek’s only real indication of laughter. But then she saw it, a gentle smile dancing across his lips. Laura wondered what Derek would be like if he wasn’t a werewolf. The whole thing with Paige wouldn’t have happened. Would he be able to smile and laugh more? But she’s his sister so she knew how much he just wanted to smile and laugh again. And be that cocky bastard he was before, a kid trying to find his place in the world. But it pained her to know that Derek was just waiting for everything to blow up in his face. Ever since Paige, he’d been waiting for the other shoe to drop. Because it had to, right? But somehow Stiles managed to burrow his way under Derek’s wall. So for the first time, in a long time, Laura saw his smile. That’s how Laura knew, knew before anyone else that her brother found his Lunar Mate. And she knew what she had to do.

“That it’s a fairytale.” Derek said picking at a loose piece of thread on his shirt. He stared at the floor like it’s the most interesting thing in the world. “What does that have to do with anything?”

Laura sighed, “What does Stiles smell like?”

Derek’s hand stilled, biting his lip, “nothing.”

“Der, be honest with me.” Laura pleaded. She moves to sit next to him on the bed.

“Like home.” Derek whispered. 

“What do you mean?”

“I told you; he smells like the woods and books. I can’t explain it. But it’s more than that. I…” Derek trailed off rubbing his hand through his hair. “He’s just a kid though. He can’t be my Lunar Mate. That’s just a fairytale.” He covers his face with his hands. “He’s a kid, Laura.”

“I know, baby bro.” Laura put her arm around his shoulders. “And that’s one of the things Stephanie Meyer got right, that slightly creepy vibe, you know, love at first sight times 1000 creepy points. That and it being a life bond.” Laura says smiling. Derek scowls at her between his fingers. “But seriously, you can’t claim him. Derek I’m serious you can’t do anything to him. If you do and the hunters find out, they won’t just kill you, Derek, they’ll kill him, too. You have to wait until he’s eighteen. You can’t even tell him about werewolves and how awesome we are. So, please, just be careful.”

“I wasn’t going to.” Derek said through clenched teeth.

“Don’t tell anyone else.” Laura called out as she left his room. 

Derek lay down on his bed staring at the ceiling. He hated that everyone kept telling him what to do. It wasn’t not like he was going to do anything to Stiles. It was just being around Stiles, Derek felt like he could finally relax instead of feeling like he had something to prove to everyone, mainly his mother, Talia. Everyone looked to Laura as the next alpha, which was fine; Derek didn’t have to deal with all that pressure. He didn't want to. But then he couldn’t help but get this feeling like his own mother only saw him as nothing better than a beta. Derek had to prove what he could do. He didn’t know how much longer he would be able to handle Talia's judging gaze like she was always saying ‘see Derek this is why you will always be a pup.’ Around Stiles he didn’t get that look. Stiles saw him for who he was. Being around Stiles, Derek could forget about trying to be an alpha. He could forget for a moment about trying to be the best werewolf for Talia; he could forget about the looks his family keeps giving him ever since Paige, pity and disappointment. He could just be sixteen. 

And alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was a long chapter...it kind of had a mind of its own. Thanks for reading, leaving kudos or comments! It helps motivate me.
> 
> Let me know if you think I missed switching Talia for Eoin.


	4. You're the Morning Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's true
> 
> The moment he laid eyes on you he knew
> 
> The only wish he wanted came true
> 
> He knows he's lucky that he met someone like you
> 
> "Mr. Right"
> 
> -A Rocket to the Moon 
> 
> Derek and Stiles plan on becoming match makers. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SO SORRY! I didn't intend to disappear for so long. RL decided to slaughter me and then bury me under everything at once. This chapter is shorter than I intended but if I added everything it would be a monster. Thank you so much for sticking around. Hopefully now that it's summer I will be able to update more frequently. 
> 
> I made a minor-ish major edit to the earlier chapters. You don't really need to read them again. I just changed the fact that instead of Talia being the one to tell Derek the fairytale it's his dad. The dad was supposed to be the grumpy, emotionally unavailable adult version of Derek but also the alpha. TW decided to make Talia the alpha I had to change it. Talia is more emotionally incompetent but more calculated. I guess a more loving Peter. It will make more sense in later chapters. 
> 
> Currently un-betaed any errors are mine. Let me know what you think.

**Chapter 4: You're the Morning Light**

Slowly, Derek and Stiles settled into a routine filled with sarcasm and eye rolls. Derek arrived exactly at 5, Monday through Friday. Together they sat at the kitchen table and did their homework. In the beginning Derek had been worried about helping a ten-year-old with his homework (how the hell do you teach addition? Are they working on adding), but it didn’t seem like Stiles had any issues. In fact, sometimes if Derek felt like it he taught the kid chemistry or geometry. When they finished their homework they would either play on the Xbox or watch a movie. Sometimes Derek would take Stiles up to Pride Rock to look at the stars. 

It was relaxing. 

Eventually Derek found himself looking forward to those days filled with so much normalcy that his chest clenched when it was time for him to return home; he kept wishing for another hour of normal. There were no werewolves or looks of pity or even an expectation of greatness because Stiles didn’t know. It was just Stiles and Derek doing homework or playing a video game. 

And Derek could finally breathe. It was like a little bit of weight was being lifted from his shoulders.

At night, in the comfort and security of his soundproof room, Derek would whisper like a mantra: Today, I can breathe a little more.

>>>

“We have to help them. It’s getting kind of sad.” Laura said walking into Derek’s room. She plopped down onto Derek’s bed resting her head on his dark blue pillows. “He just sits there in English staring at her.” 

“The door was closed for a reason.” Derek didn’t even look up from his chemistry homework. He was really starting to hate Harris. That guy probably had something against him or the entire high school population. It was probably because he couldn’t become some sort of chemist.

“If you wanted to masturbate, you shouldn’t do it in a house full of werewolves.” Laura picked up the lacrosse ball lying on the desk and threw it up into the air to catch it. “Plus, why would homework make you horny? Unless…” Laura wiggles her eyebrows, trying to look at his chemistry book.

Derek looked at her disgustedly, “I’m not hiding porn. I don’t even want to know why your brain went to that first. Don’t you have someone else to bother? Go bother Cora. I have homework to do.”  
“Look, whatever, I don’t care. That’s not even the reason why I came in here. Tell me what you know about her.” Laura rolled over to look at her brother.

“About who?” Derek’s head was starting to reel from the sudden change.

“The girl Charlie likes.”

“Charlie likes someone?”

“You are such an idiot. Yes, Charlie’s had a crush on the same girl for the last some odd years. We’ve talked about this. Where have you been?”

“Clearly not snooping in other people’s business, Ms. Nosey.” Derek smirked.

“Wipe that smirk off your face because you’re going to help me.” Laura sat up and leaned closer to her brother. “Because otherwise I tell Uncle Peter the real reason his car is scratched.” 

Derek glared at her. “You wouldn’t.”

Laura raised an eyebrow and shrugged slightly as if to say try me, and we’ll find out.

“Her name is Aria.” Derek replied suddenly, not wanting to risk Peter finding out.

Laura rolled her eyes, “Clearly I know that; she’s in my class. You’re babysitting Stiles he must talk about her. Give me the dirty details.”

“You babysit him, too.”

“Der, when was the last time I babysat him? I only did it to make you do it.”

Derek stared at her furrowing his eyebrows. He knew there was a reason why he hated that conniving, condescending, Uncle Peter smile. “Which I don’t understand why.”

Laura patted his knee. “Because I’m selfish. I want to see you smile again. I want to hear you laugh and be my annoying little brother again instead of this shell. Because Derek everyone in this family has missed you for the past six months. You know Cora thinks you don’t like her anymore? So when I realized Stiles is your mate, I had to do something.”

Derek guiltily looked away unsure of how to explain everything he felt. 

“Don’t worry, you’ll talk when you’re ready and I’ll be here.” Laura placed a comforting hand on his should. He nodded understandingly. “You just need time to lick your wounds.”

After a moment of silence and feeling Laura’s hopeful eyes boring into him, Derek said, “He doesn’t really talk about her.” 

“Ask him about her.” Laura replied sighing quietly at the change of topic.

“Isn’t she’s in your class? Why don’t you ask her?”

“Because Charlie likes her. And because I don’t think she likes me.”

“I wonder why.” Derek muttered. 

“What was that little brother?” Laura said moving closer to him.

“I said why should I help? Charlie’s the one who likes her. Shouldn’t he be finding out more about her?”

“He’s afraid. Charlie doesn’t really have any role models when it comes to love. I mean there’s you and Paige, his parents, Uncle Peter. He’s basically scared to be in love. He’s scared that she might leave him. You know? She’s human so she doesn’t feel the connection as much.”

“How do you know all of this?” Derek raised his eyebrow.

“Because I listen.” Laura replied like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Seriously Derek the world doesn’t revolve around you. People are still living their lives.”

“If I agree will you leave me alone and knock?” Derek asked. “And stop being a bitch.” 

“I’ll agree to it but I’m your sister, so you know,” Laura shrugged her shoulders, “I get to break the rules.” Laura patted him on the cheek before leaving the room.

>>>

“So are you going to do basketball this year?” Charlie asked closing his locker gently before turning his gaze over Derek’s shoulder. Derek followed Charlie’s gaze down the hall toward a frail looking girl with long light brown hair clutching her books to her chest. She rolled her eyes when a guy gave her a hesitant hug like he was worried she was going to crumble. 

“No.” Derek grunted. It brought back too many memories that he would rather avoid, like being an arrogant asshole, like meeting Paige, and like killing her. “Are you going to ask her out? The winter formal is coming up.” Derek jabbed his thumb over his shoulder in the general direction of the girl.

“No, she wouldn’t want to go with me.” Charlie said watching her. “Shit she’s coming this way.” Charlie quickly turned back to his locker staring at his lock as if he suddenly forgot how to operate it.

She walked toward them frowning at Charlie but gave a slight smile at Derek, who just raised his eyebrow. There was a smell as she walked past that didn’t sit right with Derek. It was hard to describe like a light smell of rotting leaves mixed with antiseptic chemicals. 

“Yeah, she’s totally not into you.” Derek rolled his eyes. “You really don’t understand girls.”

“That’s funny coming from you considering how you scare every single one away. Ugh.” Charlie responded hitting his head on the locker. “She probably thinks I’m a freak.”  
“Yeah, you think? And I’m the scary one? At least I’m not the idiot. By the way that’s my locker.” Derek patted Charlie on the shoulder before heading to the art class.

“It’s just…do you really think she likes me?” Charlie asked catching up to him.

Derek grunted. 

“What should I say? I mean…” Charlie trailed off as he pushed the sleeves of his sweater up. Derek looked down raising his eyebrows at the fresh bruises forming on Charlie’s arms. Quickly, he pulled the sleeves down. 

“Don’t care.” Derek grumbled before walking into the art classroom. He clenched his teeth, biting back all the comments regarding an asshole for a father who should be kicked out of the pack. He’s learned from past experience that saying anything just got Charlie hurt more. So he shut up. But Derek couldn’t stop thinking about how tightly Charlie’s dad had to have grabbed him to leave bruises on a werewolf.

“But Derek. It’s just you know she’s…” Charlie placed his messenger bag onto the table next to Derek’s. 

Derek rolled his eyes. “You want my opinion.”

“Yeah, I mean that’s what I’ve been asking for.” Charlie said. “I mean yes thanks All-mighty Derek.” Charlie added after seeing the look on Derek’s face.

“Just ask her out.” Derek said right before the bell rang.

“But what if she says no.”

“Then she doesn’t like you.” Derek said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He sighed, “there’s still that chance she could say yes. If you like her shouldn’t you risk it?”

“Will you help me?”

Derek stared at his cousin contemplating the pros and cons. “Laura already blackmailed me into helping. Said Aria’s your mate or something stupid like that.”

Charlie smiled before frowning at Derek’s drawing. “What is that?”

“It’s a self-portrait that’s the assignment.”

“Oh. Okay, I guess you look like a gorilla.” 

“It’s doesn’t…I hate you. You’re an ass.” Derek tore out the pages crumpling it before throwing it into the wastebasket. “I hate art. And I’m not helping you.” He was about to say that he hated Laura for being right once again. He was never going to admit that out loud though. Ever.  
>>>

The next day Derek knocked on Stiles’s house thinking of how he was going to get information out of Stiles. He quietly went through the list of questions Charlie and Laura thought of to get Stiles to talk about her. Sure, he never shuts up, but whenever Aria came up or the reason he moved here, Stiles changed the topic. 

They were halfway through their homework by the time Derek got the courage to ask him.

“Stiles.” Derek asked placing his pencil down.

“Yeah?” Stiles responded not looking up from the worksheet.

“What does Aria like to do?” Derek rubbed his jaw uncertainly.

“Aria?” Stiles finally looked up frowning at Derek. “Do you like her?”

“What? No. No. Definitely no.”

“Pretty sure one no was enough.” Stiles muttered turning back to the worksheet.  
It was pretty clear that Stiles didn’t want to talk about it any more. But Derek couldn’t go back to Laura with ‘Stiles didn’t want to talk about her’ as a response. She may not be his alpha yet, but her claws said otherwise. 

“It’s just…a friend of mine likes her.”

“Is it Charlie?” Stiles looked up staring intensely at Derek pleading with his amber eyes.  
Derek slowly nodded his head feeling uneasy with Stiles’s eagerness for it to be Charlie.  
Stiles mirrored Derek before saying, “Can I help?”

Derek’s only response was cocking his eyebrow.

“I mean you’re totally playing matchmaker. She’s my cousin so I want to help.” Stiles said folding his arms across his chest like a petulant child.

“Fine. Whatever. It’s Laura’s mission. I think she wants to set everyone up in Beacon Hills.”

“Okay we should trade information. So she likes reading and watching movies and TV shows especially scifi and fantasy. She likes watching lacrosse. But I think she only watches because of Charlie.”

Derek scrambled to get a piece of paper and a pen to jot down everything Stiles was saying. 

“Slow down.” Derek growled.

Stiles spent the next thirty minutes rattling off all of Aria’s likes and dislikes, her hobbies, and funny stories. 

“So, give me the skinny on Charlie.”

“Why are you helping? You were hesitant before.” Derek raised his eyebrow.

“I like Charlie. I mean she talks about him sometimes.” Stiles shrugged, flopping back against the couch. “I just think she deserves to be happy.”

“Doesn’t everyone I mean with the exception of murderers and such.”

“But that’s not how the world works. The people who least deserve it are dealt the worst hand.”

“You can have the worst hand and still win. It’s all about what you do with it.” Derek paused thinking about what he just said. May be one day he’ll be able to put the whole Paige thing behind him. Laura had told him that the first step was telling Talia about Ennis and what Uncle Peter did. What’s the next step? Letting go felt too much like a disservice to her. 

“I guess.” Stiles said. “So tell me about Charlie. He doesn’t like the first Star Wars, right? He’ll lose her respect.”

Derek spent the next ten minutes talking about Charlie and carefully maneuvering around anything pertaining to werewolves. Together (mainly Stiles) they spent the next hour working out a plan on how they were going to get Charlie and Aria together. 

Claudia walked through the door trying to stuff her keys back into her bag when she heard loud voices in the kitchen. “Hi boys, what are you two doing?” 

Stiles yelped quickly trying to stack all of their paper. He rested his elbow on it before replying “Nothing.” 

“Uh huh. Cadet I wasn’t born yesterday. Just make sure it’s not illegal. Your father is voted into his position.” Claudia shook her head.

“That depends, what are your thoughts on…”

“Illegal.” Claudia responded without any hesitations. 

“You didn’t let me finish.”

“Because whatever your thought was it was going to be illegal.” 

Stiles folded his arms across his chest. “You never take me side.” 

“See I told you Plan D wouldn’t work. It’s illegal.” Derek said yanking the paper from under Stiles’s elbow. “Don’t worry about it, Mrs. Stilinski. It was just your son thinking hiding in the zoo until after it closes is legal since it’s not ‘breaking in and entering.’”

“Claudia. I just don’t want you to go to jail because of him. He’s not worth it.”

“I don’t intend to.” Derek smirked nodding. “My cousin, Charlie, wants to ask Aria to the winter formal and he’s nervous.”

“Way to be a snitch, Derek.” Stiles shook his head. “And how dare you mother. What kind of mom are you? Moms are supposed to say nice things. I am totally worth going to jail for. You know, not that I would ever do anything illegal.” He added quickly. “Anyway, we’re working on Operation, wait did we decide on a name?”

“I told you I didn’t want any part of that.”

“Oh, right, Operation Cupid.”

“Should be Operation Stupid.” Derek muttered.

“I’m going to ignore that.”

“Stiles…do you think that’s wise?” Claudia asked frowning looking over some of the papers. Each page was littered arrows and timetables indicating what was to happen at every minute. Claudia had to laugh at the meticulous planning Stiles undertook. Sometimes she wondered if Stiles really had ADHD or if he was just highly selective about what he thought was worthwhile endeavors. But no amount of planning could cure Aria. 

“I just want her to be happy.” Stiles slumped on the stool.

“I know.” Claudia ruffled his hair. “I know.”

“Charlie likes the Spice Girls.” Derek shifted his gaze away from the solemn pair. It seemed like Derek missed an entire conversation between Claudia and Stiles.

“As in ‘zigazig ah’?”

Derek raised his eyebrow. “What is a zigazig ah?”


	5. Bruised and Scarred

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm finding out in the hardest way
> 
> The consequence of every mistake I've ever made
> 
> Baby what's it like to be alone?
> 
> I don't want to know, I don't want to know
> 
> She gave me every reason to believe I'd found the one
> 
> But my doubts somehow they sold me out
> 
> I'm bruised and scarred
> 
> Save me from this broken heart
> 
> All my love will slowly fade and fall apart
> 
>   
> “Bruised and Scarred”
> 
> -Mayday Parade
> 
>   
> All Derek wants to do is read his book. But no. He has to play therapist and match maker. He's getting a 'Do Not Disturb' sign. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the kudos and comments! 
> 
> Phew. This is actually a pretty long chapter. Longer than my usual. It's also heavy Derek centered. Well, I guess this story is heavy Derek…but more so on this chapter. I know this story is an extremely slow build to Sterek and discusses a lot about other characters. But there is a reason. It will make more sense later.
> 
> I also included a note at the end of the chapter regarding a key plot point. 
> 
> Reminders:  
> Stiles’s nickname is Cadet. Only his parents and Aria call him that.  
> Aria is a shortened form of Aredian, which is her whole name. Charlie is really the only one who calls her that.  
> Arch is the name Derek calls his wolf.

**Chapter 5: Bruised and Scarred**

For the next week Stiles called Derek everyday (even though he was going to see him in a few hours) asking for updates about Operation Cupid (Derek refused to call it that) in between fake static sounds. Derek was reminded to say ‘over,’ ‘roger,’ and ‘copy that.’ He didn’t.

Stiles told him the best way for Charlie to ask her out was with a bag of gummy dinosaurs. To which Derek’s only response was why couldn’t she ask him out with a bag of Skittles. With a sigh Stiles agreed on a compromise. They would get Charlie and Aria to ask each other out with candy. Stiles was going to convince Aria, and Derek was to convince Charlie.

It was going to be easy.

Charlie knocked on Derek’s bedroom door before opening it. “Hey Derek, can I come in?”

“It seems like everyone is coming in, except Cora.” Derek rolled his eyes. “Cora that wasn’t an invitation!” Derek shouted.

“Too late.” Cora trilled as she walked past the room. “Because now that I have your approval, I’m going to visit all the time.” She rolled her eyes. She was definitely Derek’s favorite relative. In so many ways they were alike, from the color of their hair to their personalities. May be that’s why it was so much easier to get along with her, and why she wasn’t as bothered by Derek’s shift in personality.

Derek slowly marked his book before setting it next to him on the bed. He cocked his eyebrow at Charlie signaling for him to state his purpose. 

“How are things at home?” Derek asked when Charlie didn’t reply. Charlie sighed before sitting at Derek’s desk. 

Charlie gazed at the floor, stretching the sleeve of his frayed blue sweater. Derek has always thought that the sweater made his eyes brighter and darker at the same time. It created a nice mask for the turmoil inside of him. “It’s fine. Aunt Talia had him go up to New York to talk to one of the packs about something.”

Derek nodded.

“Yeah, so, he’ll be gone for about a month.”

Again the only appropriate response Derek could think was to nod. The other was to threaten him to hurry up and get to the point of the visit. That wouldn’t help anyone.

“Why are you helping me? I mean…why do you want me to ask Aredian out?” Charlie finally asked.

“Stiles, mostly, but,” Derek shrugged, “I also know you like her. A lot. And it’s been awhile since you’ve been happy.”

“I’m always happy.” Charlie tried to give Derek a reassuring smile. Derek stared at him calling his bluff. “I mean…I have you guys. So there’s one person giving me hell. I’ll survive. Next year I’m going to go college and I’ll never have to see him again. You know aside from packing meetings, family gatherings, and all that.”

“If we could do anything…” Derek started. He bit his lip unable to meet Charlie’s eyes.

“I know.” Charlie replied. He cleared is throat. “I do like Aredian. She’s my mate.” He smiled, an honest smile, and a blush on his cheek.

“Then what’s the problem?”

“After what happened with you and my dad, I don’t know what I would do if she died.” 

Derek’s jaw clenched. “What do you mean me?”

Charlie looked at him quizzically. “It’s just, you know…” He stammered, blowing his cheeks out before he exhaled. Derek glared at him. “Really? You’re going to make me say it?” Charlie rubbed his hand in his shaggy dark hair. “Fine. Before, you were a cocky bastard, but an endearing one, and now you’re a cranky, reclusive, cocky bastard.”

Derek rolled his eyes. He was cocky; he wasn’t going to deny that. But that’s why he liked Paige. She made him want to be less arrogant. She made him want to be a better person. Isn’t that what love or having a mate was about? “I just like…” 

“Wallowing in your despair?”

“Solitude.” Derek said loudly. He sighed. “I like being alone. It’s penance for her death, though. Her death is on me. Look Charlie, she wasn’t my mate so if Aria dies for whatever reason, then it would be different for you.”

That’s when it hits Derek. This entire time he thought—no he wanted to believe—what happened between him and Paige only affected him. It was supposed to be his burden to bear. Realistically he knew that his family was worried, but he never truly realized how affected they were until he saw the look on Charlie’s face. He was completely torn over it; he didn’t want Charlie to go through the same agony, but shouldn’t he get the chance for happiness?

“Don’t let what happened to me affect your life because may be I’m not as okay as I pretend.” Derek said softly. He swung his legs off his bed planting them to face Charlie.

“Pretending? Are you serious? Do honestly think anyone was buying that charade?”

“Obviously not since everyone keeps asking me if I’m okay.” Derek sighed. He closed his eyes trying to find the right words to truly explain everything. “I thought it was my own problem.”

“Charlie?” Peter asked peaking his head into Derek’s room. “Hm, I know that grumpy face. What are you two talking about?”

Derek rumbled a silent complaint. There was no use arguing against Peter. “What’s it to you?”

“Tsk, tsk.” Peter wagged his finger at Derek. “That hurts. I care about my family.”

“We were talking about lunar mates.” Charlie said pulling his sleeve. 

“Lunar Mates, young eternal love.” Peter contemplated. “Why young Charles have you found your eternal damnation?”

Charlie cringed at the name before shrugging his shoulders. 

Derek sighed loudly knowing that this conversation was going take even longer if Charlie didn’t reply. All he wanted was to go back to his book. “He’s worried that if his mate dies then he’s going to become a jackass or a recluse.”

“The truth? All of that’s entirely possible. The recluse is unlikely. That girl, whatever her name was, wasn’t Derek’s mate.” Derek’s chest tightened slightly. Peter continued like he didn’t notice. “At some point every werewolf learns about Lunar Mates, right?” Peter waited for them to nod. “What gets left out is actually important to know. When mates bond it’s not just a union of two people it’s also a union of the two souls within the werewolf. The human and wolf souls become one. In doing so one has complete control over the wolf. So when a mate dies, leaving the other behind, they can go a little crazy. It’s true when they say a part of the soul dies with the one you love. The control is gone and the wolf comes out.”

“Is that what happened to my dad?” Charlie asked.

“Depends if you believe in fairytales.” 

“You said bonded, what about un-bonded?” Derek asked tilting his head.

“Good question. I’ve heard it’s like knowing that you will always be missing a part of your soul that can’t be easily replaced. Actually your dad would know about that.” Peter pointed at Derek. “But remember it has to be Lunar Mates. Regular everyday girlfriend boyfriend doesn’t affect us. Well, any more than regular humans, right Derek?”

A growl erupted from Derek before he could control it. “I wish everyone would just stop mentioning her. It happened. It’s done.” He dragged his hand down his face. “Look, do what ever you want, Charlie. It’s your life. But if you ask me, if you don’t take a chance you’ll always wonder about it and you’ll regret it. Then I’ll be stuck listening to you mope about it. One Poe is enough in this family.”

“Lay off the books and the melodrama, Derek.” Peter waved his hands dismissing Derek. “Oh yeah, sudden death, supposedly, causes the unhinging of most. But knowing that the mate will die and accepting it before hand, supposedly results in less crazy.” Peter shrugged his shoulders. “Oh and Talia wants to know if you’re staying for dinner.”

“Do you think Peter is telling the truth?” Charlie asked once Peter left the room.

Derek shrugged. “Dunno. It’s Uncle Peter.”

>>>

Later that night Laura waltzed into Derek’s room plopping down next to him on the bed making him bounce a little. “You should thank me.”

“I thought we agreed that if I helped you, you’ll knock.” Derek said looking up from reading _Slaughterhouse Five_.

“No, I said I get to break the rules. For a werewolf, your hearing sucks.”

Derek sighed and placed the book to the side. “I’ll bite, what do you want?”

“I got Charlie and Aria to work together on a project for English.” She was clearly proud of herself.

“I will raise you; I got him to ask her out. Now get out.”

>>>

Derek watched as Charlie came close to asking Aria out. Seven times. It was like watching a train wreck; Derek couldn’t stop watching even though he wanted to. He was pretty sure Aria was starting to think Charlie was an idiot.

It was Friday. Derek arrived at the Stilinski’s house in time to wish Claudia a good day at the hospital. 

“Derek, get your keys.” Stiles turned to Derek once Claudia closed the door. 

Derek frowned. He should be worried that he was used to Stiles sudden change of topics and still manage to keep up. He really should, it just wasn’t normal. It was like getting whiplashed in every conversation. 

“Because we’re going to the library, obviously.”

Derek raised his eyebrow. For some reason everyone wanted to get in the way of him finishing his book.

“Aria is there with Charlie for some research paper.” Stiles replied. “And before you ask, I finished my homework. You can check it if you like. And can you actually talk like a human, you know use your words. I’m sure you haven’t used up your words for this month yet.”

“Fine.” This must have been what Laura was talking about, Derek thought. Not that it was going to make any difference.

Stiles grabbed his red sweater off the counter muttering about how speech was wasted on Derek.

The drive to the library was short, but somehow Stiles managed to tell Derek all the places he wanted Aria and Charlie to take him. He looked at Derek funny when Derek said they wouldn’t want a kid on a date. Apparently Derek didn’t understand what a date was since no one wants to date a grump. A date was going to super fun places with the people you like, according to Stiles. So why wouldn’t he able to go? Derek could only roll his eyes and wonder what his parents were teaching him. He decided Aria could have fun breaking the news to the kid.

Once they were at the library, Stiles and Derek quickly found Aria and Charlie sitting across from each other at a table. Stiles raised two fingers pointing at his eyes then motioned toward a nearby aisle. It would give them a good view of the pair while being slightly obscured by a rather dusty fake palm.

Stiles sighed at the scrunched up look Derek gave him. “Seriously have you not seen any spy movies?”

Derek closed his eyes in exasperation. 

“Let’s watch them from over there.” Stiles pointed at the aisle again mouthing each word exaggeratedly. 

“Why are we here?”

“Because you were supposed to get Charlie to ask her out, and he hasn’t. So now I have to.” Stiles explained like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He still wasn’t sure how Derek managed to mess everything up. It was probably because he’s emotionally constipated, Stiles thought, no wonder he doesn’t understand what a date is.

Charlie kept glancing toward where Derek and Stiles were hiding. Eventually explained he was going to look for a book, Charlie walked slowly toward Derek.

“Shit.”

“You’re not supposed to swear in front of a kid.”

“You’ve probably heard worse.”

“That’s not the point.”

“Whatever, he’s coming this way. So, James Bond, what are we supposed to do?”

“Okay, that’s fine. I’ll go talk to Aria, you know say ‘hey Aria what a coincidence meeting you here.’ Yeah, I’m going to help them.” Stiles said nodding along to the plan he formed in his head. Derek could almost hear him saying that it was the greatest plan ever.

“Help them? May be you should stop meddling?”

“Are you kidding? When I was five I wanted a Great Dane and a van. Just stay here keep Charlie busy.”

Derek raised his eyebrow. Before he could stop him, Stiles was gone.

“What are you doing here? Are you spying on me?” Charlie said turning down the aisle.

“Stiles, wanted to keep an eye on Aria.”

“Stiles.” Charlie nodded thoughtfully.

“Why haven’t you asked her out? If you had asked her out already I wouldn’t be here. I could be reading my book; you know, I could finally finish it once everyone stops interrupting me.” Charlie smirked at Derek rambling. “Shut up.” Derek glowered.

“It’s more complicated than that.” Charlie sighed pushing the sleeves up. “I keep thinking about what Uncle Peter told us. And I can’t help but be scared.”

“It’s better to have one day than no day at all.”

“What?”

“It’s just some stupid fairytale Stiles told me. Something about a prince and princess only being able to see each other for a day every year. He said that it was better that they got to see each other for that one day than never again. They got to be happy for at least a little while. May be it’s your turn to be happy for a change even if it’s for a little while.”

Charlie chuckled. “That kid really got to you. May be that’s why there are Lunar Mates, you know, to remind us what it’s like to be happy; what it’s like to be alive. Think about it. Aredian came into my life shortly after my mom died. I never caught her scent before then even though she’d lived here the entire time, and Stiles came after Paige.”

“Yeah, maybe.” Derek said watching Stiles. He was saying something about candy to Aria who put her head in her hands shaking her head.

“I better get back.”

Derek nodded. 

“Hey Derek, I don’t know what to do when I’m around her.” Charlie asked turning back around.

“Be yourself.”

“Myself? What if she thinks I’m boring or what if I do something stupid?”

“You’re asking me? On my last date I killed my girlfriend.”

“Derek, joking? Interesting. Babysitting really changed you.” Charlie said even though he really meant Stiles. Laura was right; Stiles was changing Derek. May be there was something to this whole Lunar Mate thing. For the first time in a long time Charlie felt hopeful.

Contrary to what everyone else thought, Derek wasn’t blind or stupid he could tell how he’s been changing. It’s been gradual, but it still scared him. One day he just started to notice remembering Paige and remembering why she died didn’t hurt as much. The burn when his eyes changed began to dull to a pleasant burn. Every time I noticed it, he would force himself to think about how she died in his arms. It was his burden to bear. He had to; it was his punishment. To even think about dropping some weight meant the end of his atonement. There is no end for murderers. To end it meant he was a monster. A murderous monster. Monsters forget and find pleasure in the kill. Arch was a monster; Derek was not Arch. 

So Derek was Sisyphus. Forever doomed. Forever doesn’t end tomorrow or because of some fairytale.

“Whatever. Just ask her out. Give her the candy that I can smell in your bag.”

“But…”

“You’re pissing me off.” Derek growled before Charlie walked away laughing.

Once Charlie reached the table, Aria quickly stopped trying to convince Stiles that she was not in fact in love with one Charlie Offre. She smiled at him when Charlie greeted Stiles. Slowly, Charlie reached into his bag handing Aria the content.

“Gummy dinos? These are my favorite. How’d you know?” Aria asked smiling. She took the bag that he handed her, holding it gently.

“Aredian, I really like you. I thought we could see a movie tomorrow.” Charlie at his sweater sleeves nervously. He looked back at the aisle seeking for some sort of support. Derek could hear Charlie’s heart jackhammering in his chest.

Biting her lip, she stared up at him. A slight tangy smell was enough to smother the ever-present perfume of decay that seemed to envelope Aria. Her heart rate increased mirroring Charlie’s. That’s the thing about heart rate: you can’t know exactly why it accelerated. It could be they’re afraid of being caught in a lie, exercise, or breaking someone’s heart. You can’t know unless you read their minds. But that day, Derek knew; he groaned when he saw her face. Slowly he stepped away from the sanctuary of the aisle to give his cousin support. He was going to need it. 

“Oh. That’s sweet.” Aria looked away from the growing group. She let out a shaky breath before continuing. “I’m sorry, if I gave you the impression…you’re sweet.”

“Aria!” Stiles said with wide eyes. Derek wasn’t sure if Stiles was more shocked that he read the signs wrong or that Aria was saying no. But he knew she was breaking two hearts with one lie. 

“I’ll see you at school on Monday. I’ll have my part done.” Aria said quickly gathering her things. Derek saw the tears welling in her eyes as she looking at the bag of candy she left on the table. “Cadet I’ll see you on Sunday. I have to go.” 

“Aria I thought you like him.” Stiles said loudly almost shouting really. “Aria!” The librarian pointedly looked at them shushing them.

“At least now I know how she feels.” Charlie said trying to laugh, but a gargled whine came out that tore apart Derek’s heart. Arch paced inside Derek wanting to give Charlie’s wolf comfort. Charlie quietly put his books back into his bag.

“It’s not the end of the world. So she doesn’t like you. It’s not like you were dating her.” Derek said rubbing Charlie’s back giving him some comfort. 

Charlie looked at Derek. His pressed his lips tightly together as he nodded. “Not the end of the world? But it feels like the world gave out when your heart breaks, doesn’t it? She is—was…” Charlie started before glancing at Stiles who was watching the cousins. “Here you can have these Stiles.” 

Stiles grabbed the hem of Derek’s leather jacket sleeve while he stared at the candy. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have dragged you into this. You didn’t even want to be a part of this plan. It was stupid. I just…I just thought that since she talked about him a lot that she liked him.”

“Hey it’s not your fault kid. It’s no one’s fault, but mine.” Charlie said reassuringly rubbing Stiles’s head. “And wishful thinking. Shouldn’t you get him home? Can you take my bag though? I’ll be fine. I just want to walk.” Charlie added after seeing the face on Derek’s face and hearing the whine in the back of throat. He was clearly torn between comforting Charlie and comforting Stiles. “I promise. This is the least depressing part of my life. But thanks for the concern.”

For the rest of the night as Derek drove them back to the Stilinski’s, Stiles repeated that he was sorry. All Derek could do, or rather the only thing he could think of, was to watch movies with Stiles pressed against his side. Every once in a while he thought he heard a loud deep whine coming from the direction of the preservation. 

By the time the Sheriff came home Stiles had fallen asleep with his head resting on Derek’s shoulder. He gently moved Stiles so that he was lying down on the couch. He moved slightly, mumbling an incoherent word before going back to a deep sleep. The Sheriff snorted at the image of Stiles sleeping on the couch. Derek told him that Stiles wasn’t going into the matchmaking business. He grabbed his jacket before going into the kitchen to leave.

“His heart is in the right place.” The Sheriff said sighing. He grabbed a bottle of whisky pouring a little into a glass with a thick base. It made a loud, deep clunk when he placed it back onto the counter after taking a sip. Derek stopped in his tracks realizing that the Sheriff had more to say. “He’s just that type of kid. He wants everyone to be happy.” He took a small sip from the cup before continuing. “Especially when it comes to Aria. He blamed God for her cancer because what kind of God would give a child cancer?” 

The Sheriff confirmed Derek’s suspicions of what the smell that the surrounded Aria was. Only now he realized it wasn't rotting leaves, it was the smell of her body betraying itself. He looked at the sleeping child. “She’s dying.”

The Sheriff nodded. “Stage IV. That’s why we moved here. Claudia wanted to help her brother. They don’t act like cousins; they’re more like siblings. So we wanted them to spend whatever time she has left together. May be it would have been better if we had stayed in Alaska and just came down for the funeral.” The Sheriff said downing the rest of his whiskey, sighing deeply. “I kept you here long enough. How much do we owe you?”

Derek shook his head. “I think you did the right thing. You’d have regretted it even more if you didn’t move here. It hurts right now, but death is less painful when you’re with people you love. Stiles just wanted to give her one more person.” 

“I hope so.” The Sheriff said sleepily.

“Good night, sir.”

>>>

“Hey Derek…”Cora poked her head into Derek’s room a few days later. “Taking you up on the offer to barge into your room.”

He moved his headphones to hang around his neck before looking at her. He was going to buy a ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign soon. “Why does everyone keep coming in here?”

“Because you’ll tell us how it is; you don’t fluff it up and put a pretty bow on it. If you’re not worried then we know it’s not a big deal. That’s why with you acting like a douchebag, drama queen because of Paige we knew it’s a bigger deal than you’re letting on. You’ve been wielding this stoic asshole persona like a shield to protect yourself from how you really feel.” Cora said sitting next to him on the bed. Derek was always amazed at how often the words that came from her mouth didn’t match her physically. She looked like she was ten or eleven, but she had the soul of thirty year old.

“When’d you get so wise?”

Cora shrugged. “Mom and Dad screwed up when you and Laura were born. Third time’s a charm.”

Derek rolled his eyes pushing her off the bed.

“So what’s wrong with Charlie?” She rested her head on the edge of the bed. “Didn’t you hear Charlie the other day? Now it’s like there are two of you.”

Derek sighed before telling her about what happened with Aria. 

“Her loss. Too bad there isn’t anything you can do.” Cora said before standing up. “Oh and by the way, Stiles? He’s moping at school. Probably not related.” She shrugged walking away.

“I hate everyone in this family.” Derek called after her. He’s known for a few days what he should be doing. He just didn’t want to get involved anymore. It was time to talk to Aria because he knew she was Charlie’s mate. He knew she felt the connection; she had to. So to make everyone happy he grabbed his jacket grumbling about how this wasn’t his job and headed over to Aria’s house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize if anyone is offended by the God comment. It is not my intent to offend. I just think that it is a normal reaction to question God's existence when something bad happens to a good person.


	6. Sleeping with Ghosts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hush
> 
> It's okay
> 
> Dry your eye
> 
> Soulmate dry your eye
> 
> Cause soulmates never die
> 
>   
> 
> 
> "Sleeping with Ghosts" - Placebo
> 
>   
> 
> 
> A very Derek centric chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long absence. There has been a lot to do between school and work. I am working on this whenever I get the chance, which isn't often...sorry.
> 
> BUT thanks for all the support, comments, kudos, and subscribing to a flakey writer.

****

Chapter 6: Sleeping with Ghosts

Standing in front of a rather ordinary house, Derek looked down at the scrap piece of paper making sure he had the right address. He never realized how close Aria and Stiles lived to each other. When the wind blew from a certain direction Derek could smell Stiles’s scent. Taking a deep breath of the scent, and silently cursing his family, Derek knocked on the door before shoving his hands into his pocket. On the other side was Aria looking the same, light brown hair and rotting leaf smell. The normalcy struck a cord within Derek. For the past few days he watched Charlie trying to act like everything was fine and failing. Miserably. If he noticed then it was bad. He was kind of hoping she was in the same amount of despair.

“Why?”

“Why what?” Aria cocked her head.

“Why won’t you go out with Charlie? Even though, I know you like him.”

Aria sighed, opening the door further. While indicating for Derek to sit in the living room she went to the kitchen to grab a couple bottles of water. “There are a lot of reasons. The biggest one, Derek, is that I have cancer. I’m on enough drugs to kill a horse, yet they’re the only things keeping me alive. Irony. Charlie deserves better than what I can give him.” Aria said once she sat next to Derek on the couch, handing him a bottle. 

Derek nodded indicating that he knew. “Charlie knows too.”

She stared at him like she had hoped that Charlie never found out. Derek told her that he didn’t tell him because it wasn’t his place to tell anyone. He actually wasn’t really sure how Charlie found out. Maybe it had something to with being Lunar Mates. It was her secret to share if she wanted to. Derek wasn’t going to tattle on the Sheriff though. At the time it seemed like the Sheriff needed to talk to someone about it, someone who wasn’t related, someone to tell him that he made the right choice.

“I wrote a bucket list at the start of freshman year. Every year that list gets shorter. Not because I accomplished them, but rather I’m running out of time. As much as I want to fall in love with someone, it’s just not feasible. I crossed it off years ago.” Aria said picking at the label on the bottle with her thumb. She bit her lip. Letting out a shaky breath she continued. “It seems like every appointment is a countdown to the end. My doctors think I might be able to graduate. I just want to graduate high school, Derek, that’s all. So falling in love? I literally don’t have time. And Charlie deserves someone healthy, someone he can hold in five years. I can’t be that person.”

“Charlie loves you, cancer and all. The way he sees it the cancer is a part of you. The cancer may kill your body, but the part of you that he loves the most can’t die. He’ll always love that part of you. If you can’t understand that, then it’s _you_ who doesn’t deserve him.” Derek stared piercingly at her. He had to press his hands together to calm his nerves. After Aria turned Charlie down, Derek had asked him if he would have asked her out even if she weren’t his Lunar Mate. He said yes without any hesitation because she managed to smile with her heart (he could tell) even in the face of her mortality. It takes strength to remain happy and optimistic knowing there is a grenade inside of you. Seeing her not let the cancer make her a victim gave Charlie strength in facing his demons. She gave him hope when he had none. That and she loved Star Wars. “I stopped believing in the possibility of love until I saw the way he looks at you. He would fight every god damn monster if it meant keeping you safe and happy.”

“Cancer is one monster he can’t protect me from.”

For a moment, Derek let himself think about the deplorable possibility of changing her. The bite could cure her of the cancer and ensure a long happily ever after for both her and Charlie. He shook his head clearing all thoughts of that non-option. “He’ll try his damnedest.”

Aria paused, closing her eyes she said, “I’m sorry.”

Derek nodded and got to leave. He tried; no one could say that he didn’t. It was just…he had hoped that maybe for once he could do something right by getting her and Charlie together. In some ways he had hoped there was some truth to true love and Lunar Mates and all of those stupid fairytales. 

“I meant about you and Paige. You couldn’t protect her even though you loved her.” Aria explained giving him a soft reassuring smile. Derek sank back down into the seat.

“Not as much as Charlie loves you. Not nearly as much.” Derek said glumly. He wondered how life would have been so completely different if only he had known what love looked like, how it felt earlier. Everything would have been so different. He wouldn’t have gone out with Paige. She would still be alive. He wouldn’t have her blood on her hands. “What happened was different.”

“Yeah. But it stills hurts, doesn’t it? Falling love only to have it torn away. How could I knowingly put Charlie through that pain?”

Derek scoffed. “It’s funny this entire time I thought you just didn’t want to hurt Charlie. But it’s the opposite. You’re scared for yourself.”

“I am.” Aria bit her lip before looking away. “I know that if I go out with him, if I let myself love him completely, it’s going to break me. I came to terms with death a long time ago. But…I’m going to be lying on the hospital bed wondering what my life could have been with him if I wasn’t sick.”

“And if you don’t, you’ll still be lying on the hospital bed wondering what your life could have been with him. At least the other way, you’d have known. You think he’s not scared? He’s terrified. But he thinks you’re worth everything even if it’s just for a little while. He’ll stay with you.”

“I don’t want him to see me. I’m going to lose my hair eventually. Dying isn’t glamorous.”

“What did I say before?” Derek rolled his eyes. “He knows.”

“Knowing is different from actually seeing it, from actually being a part of it. You hear stories all the time of the loved one promising to stay only to leave when it becomes too much.”

“He wouldn’t do that.” Derek said shaking his head. “He loved you from the time he saw you at the hospital. He talks about it all the time. It was the first time he smiled after his mom passed away.”

Aria smiled softly. “People talk about how love at first sight is an illusion, but when I saw Charlie back in elementary I just knew he was the only one I ever wanted to love. He was this shy kid so we never spoke. Then the summer before freshman year I was going into the hospital for my first oncological appointment. I bumped into him as he was leaving. I didn’t find out until later about his mom. But that day when he smiled at me I just knew that no matter what the report said everything was going to be okay, and that I was going to love him forever. Then four months into school we still didn’t talk.”

“You started to doubt the feeling? He feels it too. What you and Charlie have it’s special. He…feels a connection with you. If you want to believe in soul mates, that’s what you guys are. Maybe the whole purpose of life is finding the missing part of our souls. And you two were lucky to find each other.”

“I never knew you were a sap.”

“Shut up. If you ever tell anyone…” Aria laugh sounded like she was bringing back life. In that moment, Derek knew why she was Charlie’s Lunar Mate—she showed him life in the face of death.

“I’ll think about what you said.” 

>>>

Laura could smell Derek pacing back and forth in front of her door. So today is the day, Laura thought. She leaned back in her chair facing the door waiting for it to open. Entering had to be his choice otherwise he would have given her some bullshit answer for coming to her room. Five minutes. Then a soft sigh, an increase heart rate, and the tang of sweat penetrated the door.  
Derek softly knocked on the door. “Laura.” He said quietly like it was a secret. 

“Enter.”

Derek slowly opened the door and closed it behind him.

“I’ve been thinking maybe it’s time for that talk you promised.”  
Laura shrugged her shoulders. Derek nodded sitting on her bed. It had been awhile since he had been in her room, but it hadn’t changed much. It was still painted in that awful mustard color that she loved so much. She said it gave the room a more rustic feel; it reminded her of the woods. He didn’t see it. 

“Mom thinks it was my fault, doesn’t she?” Derek finally said. “Paige’s death, I mean.”  
Laura shook her head. “I’m not going to lie, she did, but Derek, she just thinks it was selfish of you. She didn’t give you the answer that you wanted so you found another Alpha, which you refuse to tell her. But you know Mom gets it. You thought you were in love with Paige, and love makes you do stupid things.”

“It’s just Uncle Peter was saying how she—Paige—wouldn’t be able to accept me if she ever found out. And I thought if she was one of us then it would be okay.”

“We can live longer than humans. We can’t help but want to find someone to share that time with us. You thought it was Paige. You can’t blame yourself anymore that’s the first step, understanding that you made a mistake.”

“I always kind of knew she wasn’t my mate.” Derek said quietly.

Laura waited for him to continue.

“It’s just…she was pretty and she played the cello. It was nice. All my friends were getting girlfriends and they kept asking me why I didn’t. They’d ask if I’m gay. Then she walked in. Arch, the wolf inside me, knew that something was wrong, but couldn’t figure it out. Uncle Peter kept saying all these things and I was worried about what would happen if she found out, that was the human fear. That’s why I asked Ennis to change her so that maybe if she smelled like a werewolf it would be better. Then she died. And I felt guilty; it was my fault. I should have left her alone…what if Arch wants to turn Stiles and he dies?”

“Derek, just because there are mates for us doesn’t mean that we can’t look for love. You couldn’t have known that was going to happen.”

“I should have. I can’t trust Arch. Not again.”

“You call your wolf Arch and your human side Derek, but they’re the same. You don’t become someone new. Derek you had asked me before what the next step is. It’s forgiving yourself.”

“I can’t just forgive myself and forget what I did.” Derek said to Laura finally.

“Little bro, forgiving yourself isn’t the same thing as forgetting. You’ll always remember her. Letting go is about forgiving yourself for something that you couldn’t have known was going to happen. It’s about never forgetting what you did so that it will never happen again.”

“But I should have kept her safe. It’s my fault.”

“And that’s why, you’ll never be able to move on; you can’t let her go. But that’s the only way you’ll ever be able to move on. At the time you thought you were making the best choice.”  
Derek toyed with a loose thread mulling over Laura’s words. “What’s step two?”

“Talking to someone about it.” Laura said. “Congrats you did step two. You’re admitting that you did something that needs forgiving. The fact that you resent yourself is testament to the fact that you are human and that you cared about her. You’re not a murderer. A murderer wouldn’t feel remorse. But you do. Contrary to what you may think you’re not some rabid animal. You are a caring, loving, thoughtful person who understands pain and suffering. You gave her mercy. You ended her suffering.” Laura said holding her brother’s shoulders tightly. “You saved her.”

“Step three?” Derek asked hoarsely.

“Forgiving yourself and moving on with your life.” Laura said giving him a soft smile.

“I can work on that.” Derek said his throat suddenly feeling constricted.

“I’m glad. And Derek, you should tell mom about Uncle Peter.” 

Derek nodded. “I will.”

Derek cleared his throat. “I talked to Aria about Charlie. I think she’ll ask him out.”  
Laura nodded.

After his talk with Laura, Derek went to down to the kitchen. He hugged Talia from behind as she stirred the pot of gravy. A loud whine emerged from deep within Derek.

“Derek what’s wrong?” Talia asked. She turned to face him. “Are you okay?” She turned the stove onto a lower temperature before guiding Derek to the chair.

“I talked to Laura.” Talia nodded waiting for Derek to continue. “She told me you thought it was my fault.”

“I did.” Talia confirmed.

Derek nodded. “It was. I mean I made the decision. But I never told you who suggested I ask Ennis. About a week before it happened, Uncle Peter came to the school. He told me that she wouldn’t love me if she ever found out. And that the only way for it work would be if she was turned.” Derek said his voice gravelly as he tried to control his emotions.

“That’s when you asked me.” Talia guessed.

Derek nodded. “When you said no, Uncle Peter suggested Ennis.”

“Thank you for telling me. Uncle Peter shouldn’t have suggested anything.” Talia said in such a controlled voice that Derek knew she wasn’t happy. She stood up hugging her son when Eoin walked into the kitchen. And being such a sap immediately wrapped his arms around them.

“Eoin, this is a mother-son moment.” Talia said laughing as she jokingly pushed him away. She turned back to the stove as Eoin grabbed a carrot stick.

“Mom, by the way, that tree where I…where she died, it’s not a normal tree is it?”

Eoin stopped mid-bite to glance at Talia’s paling face.

She composed herself seconds later. “It’s an old tree. Our wolves are very attuned to the long history.”

Derek was just about to ask her what was special about that tree when Charlie came rushing into the kitchen.

“Derek! Aria just called! She asked if I want to go to zoo with her. Well she’s going with Stiles. But she said it’s a date. I have a date with her.” Charlie said, his smile reaching the corners of his eyes. “What should I wear?”

“Go, I’ll call you guys down when dinner is ready.” Talia said dismissing them effectively ending the conversation.

Derek furrowed his brows wondering what his mom wasn’t telling him about the tree.


End file.
